Walking with a Cramp

Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night with a screeching cramp? If you haven’t, it’s a pain much like getting drop kicked in the face by a soccer player with cleats on. Once afflicted, you snap into a state of bewildered wakefulness (like so, “Wha—Ooooww.”). Screaming does not help; the pain sadistically lingers for a few excruciating minutes, and when it finally goes away, it leaves you with one more reason to hate the universe.

This morning, I was walking my usual 1KM to work (the other 1KM from work) when a cramp seized my left leg. This persisted for a few meters, and since I was favoring the other left leg, that started cramping too. I was still at Makati Avenue, about 800 meters away from the office I needed to be at before 9 o’clock. It was 8:49.

Stuck between a hard place and a memo, I continued walking. My pride prevented two things: one, crying out every step; and two, crying. If you saw somebody half-limping and half-dragging herself at de la Rosa Street this morning, that was me. If you also saw the sour expression on my face, that was me inwardly screaming. (Step, FAAAAAAAAAK. Step, GODDAMMIIIT.)

While dragging my so-not-cooperating legs, I thought about how my pride will kill me one day. My pride prevents me from giving up when I should, but it also continually goads me into doing stupid things (i.e. walking to the office with cramps on both legs and inwardly begging for death). Why be a stubborn little shit when it’s much easier to just stop?

(When I started writing this, I could swear I had a point. Oh right.)

I think walking with a cramp is pretty much like sticking it out during a hellish week. Yes, those weeks that make a crater of boiling lava look inviting. Why do you go on when it’s much easier to type up a resignation letter dipped in acid? I go on because at the end of it all, I can log in at 9 and not be late. Also, I can get through to Friday and finally get my weekend.

So yeah, stubbornness can be a good thing at times.