|Last night at Mercury Drug|
Cashier after I hand her a bill: May piso kayo sir?
Me: Miss, wag po kayong ganyan. Nanay ko po naggupit sakin.
Cashier (visibly mortified): Ay naku, sorry po ma’am. Sorry po talaga.
*Now I just have to figure out if she was sorry for my haircut or for calling me sir.*
|Status messages|
The other day, I was trying to make up an excuse for using “Is this your Mangina speaking? Please tell me when your Balls are available for comment.” but found none.
|This morning while walking to work, this line was in my head|
“No, I don’t like tuyo,” he said, his epileptic intensity flinging drops of saliva that hit my face with as much violence as his words.
*I may have been sitting around my mom watching Magkaribal for far too long.*
|While watching a morning show|
I wonder why the daily horoscope person’s daily horoscopes always involve low or high points. (Always “You’ll fall into an open manhole today, be vigilant.” or “You’ll be lucky since the Moon has moved into Virgo and will gallivant into the former planet Pluto.” but not “Today will be blah.”)
|One of those days|
It’s one of those days when there are no reasons, no excuses, no nothing. Things aren’t bad, but they aren’t good either. Things are just there, sitting in front of you like 50 pounds of raw meat you don’t care about. You don’t know where it came from and how it came to rest on the seat in front of you either. In all that bewildered surrealism, you can’t even bring yourself to wonder if it’s a dimension crossing sack of meat that can magically manifest itself anywhere in the cosmos. In your head, it doesn’t matter if it’s imbued with the powers of the universe. It’s still just a sack of meat.
*Wait, what?*
|One day|
One day, I’ll look back at all of these things and kick myself in the face. I don’t know how I’ll manage that but I’m sure I’ll find a way.
|On the bus, on the way to work|
You know what, one day I’ll look back at all of this and laugh my head off because seriously, it’s been a retarded couple of years. Then I’ll burn that bridge when I get there, bitch.
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